3/10/2005

Part 2: John Bolton, Another Motherfucker for America:
Yesterday, the Rude Pundit moved back in the career of John Bolton, chosen by the Bush administration to become the new U.S. ambassador to the U.N. Bolton is currently an Undersecretary of State, as he was during the reign of Colin Powell, and, as the resident batshit insane neocon, Bolton's job in the Bush's first term was, more or less, "make sure that high-yellow nigger doesn't totally fuck-up our plans to destroy the world as we know it." Which Bolton did smashingly well.

Now, Bolton is being called out for saying things like, "The United Nations is a fetid, dry piece of shit that wouldn't even smear my shoe if I stepped on it," or words to that effect. Which means, once again, we Americans are all held in sway by George Bush's epic sense of irony in running the nation.

Back when Bolton was an assistant to Secretary of State James Baker under Poppy Bush, he was a little less inclined towards unilateral action by the United States. In 1989, Bolton joined Soviet Deputy Foreign Minister Vladimir Petrovsky and issued a statement of the U.S. and the Soviet Union's support of U.N. General Assembly resolution "calling on all nations to respect human rights and abandon the use of force except in defense." Said the Assistant Secretary and the Deputy Minister, "We hope that it may offer an example to other member states that it is possible to set aside tendentious polemics that have been too common in the United Nations in the past." The resolution, which re-affirmed the U.N. charter, called on nations to work cooperatively through the U.N. to solve international security issues. Bolton, who worked tirelessly to strip the International Criminal Court of any authority and was always threatening that the U.S. would back out of any U.N. organization that allowed the PLO even conditional membership, has always been a good liar. That's why he's such a motherfucker.

It was April Fool's Day, 1990, when Bolton said, "The superpowers have learned the limitations of going it alone for the past 10 years." And on July 10 of that year, he continued his praising of international cooperation, as long as it meant cooperating with what the United States wanted to do internationally, saying that the United Nations "is a bargain compared to expenditures which we might otherwise incur through unilateral military action in the world's trouble spots."

While he may not have been consistent in other ways throughout his career (which, as we now know, is called "flip-flopping" in the parlance of jerk-offs), Bolton has had a hunger to get rid of Saddam Hussein for a long damn time, since at least the first Gulf War, and he was mightily critical of the Clinton administration's approach of using sanctions, periodic bombings, and inspections to isolate Iraq. In 1998, when Clinton's tactics were really, actually, finally ridding the last vestiges of weapons and weapons programs, Bolton, as chief Republican jackbootlicker for the American Enterprise Institute, was everywhere talkin' smack about Clinton's foreign policy. According to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution in December 1998, "The Clinton administration's stated goal, to 'degrade' Saddam's weapons-making capacity, is too ambiguous and hardly a rallying cry, Bolton said." Yes, containment was for pussies, and Bolton's a real man. He told the Financial Times, "We have to articulate a policy leading to Saddam's overthrow; the alternative is to leave him with weapons of mass destruction."

We've just scratched the surface of his pre-Bush II life. But we can make some pretty solid conlusions about John Bolton: For most of his career, he's been a nationalistic liar with shitty judgment. A motherfucker. A nasty little plague-flea-infested gutter rat that thinks he's got the sharpest teeth in the sewer. That's why he fits in perfectly with the Bush adminstration, no?

Well, to be honest, Bolton wasn't wrong about everything. Back when he was fiercely opposing the independent counsel law, in 1987, according to the Washington Post, Bolton was attending a Harvard Law School Alumni debate on the law, Bolton said he had warned possible presidential candidates Joe Biden and Bob Dole that their adminstrations would also suffer under what he believed was an "unfair" law. Bolton saw the potential for abuse of the law that crossed party lines. Speaking at the event was Eliot Richardson, Nixon's Attorney General who resigned rather than commit the Saturday Night Massacre. To the "roars of laughter from the audience of lawyers," Richardson commented, "For God's sake, are we not entitled to hope that the next administration will be a little less sleazy?"

Oh, the Mexican revolutionary Bolton resembles? According to the Washington Post on October 19, 1988, Solicitor General Charles Fried said that Bolton looked like Emiliano Zapata. As the Rude Pundit said, an epic sense of irony.